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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27113498">Hindsight</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/quantum27/pseuds/quantum27'>quantum27</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>a cup of good intentions (tron one shots) [13]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Tron (Movies), Tron - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>???? mayhaps, Angst, Character Study, Gen</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 17:14:01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>488</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27113498</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/quantum27/pseuds/quantum27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A small foray into Alan's thoughts after Flynn's disappearance</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Alan Bradley &amp; Kevin Flynn</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>a cup of good intentions (tron one shots) [13]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1872664</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Hindsight</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The worst thing Alan’s realized since Flynn’s disappearance has got to be the fact that he could’ve found out the truth if he had really wanted to. He could’ve. And <em> no </em>, that’s not a lie. It’s a fact. He could’ve. He really could’ve. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>And even worse than that is the fact that he remembers thinking to himself during several conversations with his best friend, ‘<em> If I pushed right now, he would tell me. He would tell me everything. </em>’ And yet he never did. Only hinted. Only suggested. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Instead, he’d assured himself that Flynn would get better on his own, eventually. He just needed time. Or more sleep. Or both. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>And while that was probably true. It obviously wasn’t enough. And the man sure wasn’t going to do that on his own. Alan should’ve been smarter about it. He’d heard Lora’s description of Flynn after he had gotten fired from ENCOM. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Flynn’s mask wasn’t impeccable. If he thought no one noticed the act would drop. Not that the act was that good in the first place. The ever-deepening bags under his eyes- the way he would talk to himself worriedly. The loss of time- which had left Alan irritated, and yet not concerned, <em> why wasn’t he concerned </em>- that had gotten worse and worse. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>It wasn’t that he didn’t see the signs. It was the fact he had seen them. And <em>ignored </em>them. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>So, yes, Alan does blame himself for Flynn’s disappearance, aided with the knowledge he could’ve prevented it. He doesn't try to pretend that it’s not true. Perhaps if he were a better man he would try to. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He also realizes that he’s not the only one at fault. Of course. Flynn had never asked for help, after all. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Still. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Alan knew that the man would never ask for help. They all did. And yet...Well, he wasn’t the only one that ignored the signs. The oh so obvious signs. It’s easy to point fingers, of course. But what does it say when everyone’s pointing fingers at a different person? What does it mean when the world turns on Flynn himself? Well…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And then there’s Sam. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Sam.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Alan’s resolved to do everything for that kid. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>So Alan stops hinting, stops suggesting when it comes to Sam. Well. At least if he does, he’s a lot more forceful about it. He takes a cue from Flynn in this regard, and becomes downright <em> annoying, </em>about things. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He emphasizes on Sam being honest. He’ll take anger, venomous rage; a punch to the face even, if it means it’s Sam’s genuine feelings. If it means he gets to see the smiles and laughter that comes along with it, that’ll just be a bonus, in the long run. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>But he’s sure as hell not gonna let Sam spiral like his father did. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He’s not going to. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He’s not sure he could survive it this time. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He’d rather Sam hate him than anything else.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>the 'if i pushed he would tell me part' was actually in something else i wrote that i kinda scrapped from something else but it keeps popping back in my brain.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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